Family Tree

by Jen Myzel

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released June 30, 2013

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Jen Myzel Berkeley, California

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Track Name: Yellow Lotus Flower
Yellow Lotus Flower, like the sun you rise up from the darkness
Beyond grief is understanding, like the sun we rise up from the darkness

One lonesome yellow flower wanted to sing a song
She asked the lily pads and the frogs to sing along
Before she knew it there was a symphony at the pond
One lonesome yellow flower sharing her life song

I was born at the bottom of this muck
A slimy seed I was murky and stuck

Till a golden fish swam by
And what he said just changed my life

There's light at the top, you've got to believe me
So grow up and up, he beseeched me
Yeah, Yeah

Yellow Lotus Flower, like the Sun you rise up from the Darkness
Beyond Grief is Understanding like the sun we rise up from the darkness

I didn't know if this while light thing could be true
But I had to give it my all and see my mission through
So I sent my root down into the darkness of that scum
It cracked my skin open and the water entered my blood


My Green arms were growing, my torso was getting strong
I could feel the life within me writing its own song
I tilted my body back and lifted my head up high
For the first time in my life I felt the blue beginning
Of the Sky

This is it I'm almost there
Maybe it's too good I feel so scared
I feel a tightening here comes the air
And I gasped exploded and I
Opened my eyes
To the Gracious Sun
And in that moment she looked back at me we fell deeply in love
She warmed my yellow smile as I cried out loud
I'd never felt so loved I didn't know I was allowed

Oh Yellow Lotus Flower You are my sunshine
Oh won't you let me kiss you for the rest
Of Your Life

Yellow Lotus Flower, like the Sun you rise up from the darkness
Beyond Grief is Understanding like the sun we rise up from the darkness.
Track Name: Make Me an Instrument
I've been watching myself waiting all my life
For teachers telling me what's right
But now my pen and papers pouring out with song
And I don't give a damn who thinks I'm right
or wrong

I've been staying up late listening to the sky
For all the light years passin' by
And once I find my place within this universe
I can't deny much longer how much this Earth is worth

The ocean carries me away in my dreams
And when I wake she cleanses me
The salt of her body runs down my cheeks as I
Awaken to my purpose within this here human dream

Lord Make me an Instrument of your Peace
Lord Make me an Instrument of your Love
Lord Make me an Instrument so I can Sing, Yeah Yeah
Lord Make me an Instrument so I can sing
so I can sing
so I I I can sing

Water
Carry Away all that we do not need
To bring into the future
Fire
Burn to the ground all of the hatred and fear
Fire
Burn me up till all that is left are the ashes of Love
Burn me up till all that I am is Love
Burn me up up up up up

Lord Make me an Instrument of your Peace
Lord Make me an Instrument of your Love
Lord Make me an Instrument so I can sing, Yeah Yeah
Lord Make me and Instrument so I can sing
so I can sing
so I I I can sing
Track Name: Family Tree
Packing up my bags again
Searching for a place to call my home
A generation so confused
Like branches Fallen, Crawling to our Roots

The apple has fallen too far from the tree
I don't even know my family history

Am I enslaved or am I free?
Am I to blame for all this suffering?
Am I the victim or the perpetrator?
Or am I everyone in an old old story
In an old story, In an old, old story

Oh have I borne the whip before?
Have I birthed the child before?
Have I been the one to load the gun?
Was I once a medicine man?
Have I been a hooligan?
Did I live off nothing but the sun?

Give me some clue who I am
A Jew, a Homo Sapien
A body, spirit, no one at all?

I'm broken branches on the floor
Disconnected from my source
And I'd do anything to survive

Burst my heart and bleed my veins
Open up ancestral pains
Teach me what they went through just to stay alive


River running lineage
Help me open the gift you've given me
My life
Passed on down through the babies you once bore

As I learn more of your ways
I wonder why it's rare these days
To sing a prayer
Or light a candle
There's only time once all the work is done
But as far I can see across the skyline of this city
the work is never-ending
Seems to me like everyone's got something to save
I'm just trying to save the holy seed
Of the Family Tree
That's been passed on to me
Like a fruit, or a grain
My only goal in life is to preserve life
To receive life
To revere life
Persevere life
To preserve life
To receive life
To revere life
Persevere life

My broken branches feel the rain
Pouring down the window pain
As memories awaken in my spine

Taproots are going down
Rain pour in my open mouth
Now I can remember just why they stayed alive
Track Name: My Body as the Revolution
Let the Sky Fall
Let the Earth Move
Let your Heart beat to the rhythm of the song
Let the music guide you and carry your way home
Home x.4

Let the love in
No need to be afraid
Let your heart sing the words of the song
Let your feet guide you and dance your way home
Home x.4

Let your wings out
Jump but don't look down
Let your heart fly like an eagle in the sky
Till you nest and rest and find your way home
Home x.4


If every star is the sun to another world
THen who am I to tell you what is true?
If I could learn just one thing or two
I'd be on my way to seeing this life through
Yes I'd be on my way to seeing this life through

They say the New Earth is on its way
I feel its axis turning around
My head is spinning around and around
And if I only touch the ground
I feel my body as the revolution
I know my body as the revolution
I Love my body as the revolution

I feel my body, know my body, love my body, everybody.
I feel my body, know my body, love my body, everybody....

Let the Sky Fall
Let the Earth move
Let your heart beat to the rhythm of the song
Let the music guide you and carry your way home
Home x.4
Track Name: The Trail
The Trail is calling me and I must go
The Trail is calling me and I must go
The Trail is calling me
The Trail is calling me
The Trail is calling me and I must go

The Path we walk on we will never know
The Path we walk on we will never know
The Path we walk on
We will never know
How far ahead how far behind does it go

And will it take us to a higher ground
Or will it take us to the sea below
To a higher ground
To the sea below
This Path we walk on we will never know
Track Name: Heart Broken Open
Oh if I knew
What you were gonna do
I still wouldn't change a thing about the way I loved

And if I could have seen
How quickly you would flee the scene
I still wouldn't take the love that we made back

My heart was heavy and sad
Mourning all the love that we could've shared
But I understand that you had a different plan

And all that's left of me is everything I was before
With a little more love in my heart
And a little more truth I get to sing about

Though it may sound sad
But the story just passed me by
Love is always a gift in life and I have no regrets to cry about

When I start missing you
I reach deep down into my heart
For that infinite eternal spark
For the lover that lives deep inside myself

Now there was a hole inside my heart
Where I was making room for you
But that's alright I filled it up with light

Some would call this a broken heart
But my heart is broken open
Love and pain in God's arms are the same

Could I have seen how this would turn out?
A musical travelin' man and I'm tryin to settle down
Well that's just life you learn a thing or two

And all that's left of me is everything I was before
With a little more love in my heart
And a little more truth I get to sing about

Though it may sound sad
But the story just passed me by
Love is always a gift in life and I have no regrets to cry about

When I start missing you
I reach deep down into my heart
For that infinite eternal spark
For the lover that lives deep inside myself

If this is the hardest part
To risk love and have it fall apart
Then I'll take it all the loving and the fall

I think if you really want to love
You've got to let go as much as you hold on
When love is true every day is new

And if there's a reason for it all
I must be learning how to fall
In and out of love with an open heart

The last words I heard from you were
Goodbye beautiful soul
Thank you for all the love that you're still giving me in my heart

He said I hope that you
Shine bright as the sun and sing my little bird for everyone
I can still hear you now

And thank you for
All your healing my muse I send you all the love in my heart
On your precious journey

I said so it will be
So it will be
So it will be.
Track Name: Oh My Little Child
Oh My Little Child
Be Careful with your tender heart
It's a tricky game to play
You've got to learn when to trust and when to back away

Oh My Little Child
Open up your eyes to see the world
But Oh My Little Child
You're gonna wanna save the world
Know its not your burden to hold

On an icy winters day
Would you run out naked in the cold?
Oh My Little Child
Please wrap your heart up in your soul
And let your destiny unfold


My little Child, My Voice Inside, My little Destiny
Self-Liberation frees every generation in your family tree
My Little Child, My Voice Inside, My Little Destiny
The most important gifts in your life will come, in disguise


There may come a time
When you feel you've left the world behind
I know its strange my child but the only way to help is to free your mind
And shine your light on those you've left behind
I do believe my child
That people want to be free
What they don't know my child
Is in their minds they hold the key
Too simple to be liberty is what they'll say my child
But you can help them to see

My Little Child, My Voice Inside, My Little Destiny
Self-Liberation frees every generation in your family tree
My Little Child, My Voice Inside, My LIttle Destiny
The most important gift in your life will come, in disguise.
Track Name: Just As You Are
I'm writing this song in the middle of the night
To keep my mind pointed towards the light
I wanna run away but there's nowhere to go
I wanna hide away but I'm always gonna show

So I might as well
Tell you how I feel
I'm waiting for someone who wants to be real
To hold me tight in the middle of the night
And whisper something of sweet delight

I see your smile, though its a blur
I'm waiting for someone who wants to go deeper
To ride the waves, and laugh as you fall
And stand up again, just as you are

We can drink tea and kiss in the rain
I'm waiting for someone, I don't know your name
We can read books, and play the guitar
And dance in the moonlight just as we are

I used to think that falling in love
Was a weakness of the heart
But now I see, standing strong
You can fall in love just as you are

This very song is the seed
From which the flowers of tomorrow grow
Water in the sky, nourish this seed
Music in the wind to you I will reach

Music in the wind to you I will reach
Track Name: Spiritwalker (In honor of poet, Nancy Wood)
Spiritwalker
With long legs poking out of rain clouds
Along the Mesa tops

Listen to our prayers for understanding
Spiritwalker, Mmmhm

Spiritwalker
With footsteps echoing like promises
across the aching land

Give Fire and Ice
to purify us
Spiritwalker, Mmhhmm

Spiritwalker
Whose tears that fall as snow and rain
Heal our forests, our rivers, our homes
And the hearts of all creatures, Mmhhmm

Spiritwalker
Heed the cry of every living thing
And bathe the Earth in harmony

Spiritwalker
Heed the cry of every living thing
And bathe the Earth in harmony
Track Name: Letters from the Future- Part 1
There was a time, our Grandmother told us, when the darkness almost won. She said the people's hearts were shrouded in clouds of years of fear, delusion and denial. She said the people were not strong. Very weak. And they had minds bigger than their hearts. But these were just the ones who were scared, they were hurting inside.

Grandmother told us not to be afraid as she tucked us into bed that night, because this illness had passed us now. We were freed, and we are free now to speak of it in a sacred manner.

She said to please preserve the history of our people, because it helps us to grow and to be wise. Once the heart is strong like a lion, fierce like a tiger, full of overflowing love like a spring pouring out onto the Earth. Once the heart is this strong, she said, like yours are, there is nothing to be afraid of any longer. We were in the bardos then. We were en route to a more harmonious way of life.

But it wasn't without a fight. A good fight, she said. Our Grandmother that is, a warrior of her time. See-er, one who knew the trees. A dragonfly spider woman of the heart and words. She made a difference in her life. We are so proud to descend from Grandmother.

She told us things that night, that you don't wanna know about, because you almost can't believe it ever could've been that way, and such a short time ago.
Track Name: Letters from the Future- Part 2
She said in those days, the sky could fall in any moment and break you. Break your body into a million pieces. And not in the way that the Earth will one day slowly return our bodies back to the soil that feeds, but literally shatter like glass. 1-2-3- poooof. And gone. And it was not of the will of the Mother Earth but of the people with big minds and little hearts.

She said that the images were everywhere across the Earth. THe images of darkness and greed, and she said there were days when she cried, and doubt would creep into her trembling heart. Is this the end of our people? she would think.

But her heart had a will. She knew it did. And every day gave her just enough strength for the next, and the next.

She said that for almost everyone then, they had to heal the darkness within their own spirit bodies. Many of them, including Grandmother, were born into bodies to which the milk did not flow, and the corn and the wheat and the sweet, sweet vegetables of the Earth were only half alive.

Like a lion, coming out of its cage for the first time, like when they freed the animals from the zoo, Grandmother said, she and the others had to relearn how to be wild. She said after so many years in a cage, one has to remember, over and over again, how to be free.

We were crying by now in Grandmothers story, because we knew what she said to be true. She said please don't lose the history, because otherwise you will lose a part of me; our legacy. She said yes my loves, I can understand your tears. It is very sad for all those people who died with broken hearts. But remember also my loves, that was then, and this is now.
Track Name: Letters from the Future- Part 3
We have already won. The war was an illusion, a confusion, said Grandmother. As soon as enough of us remembered how to Love, there was no question in which direction the Earth would turn, or how to grow a seed and kiss all of life with our lips. To hug each other awake every day. It was our work then, to bring Love back into the hearts of all people. And Love was irresistible. It always will be.

But it was a time when it took great courage for Love to take root in our souls. There was no other choice, we had no clue where it would take us, where we were going, but we were off, like golden fire birds flying through the night sky. Graceful, Illuminating, Swift, fearlessly determined to awaken the people from their slumbers.

We knew what was at stake, Grandmother said; as she held our small hands to her heart, tears poured down her face like the mouths of rivers, finally, after years of winding down mountains and hillsides, releasing back into the sea.

She deeply exhaled, and said again, we knew what was at stake, and it was too great to lose. So we won.